Saturday, May 21, 2011

Concerning Hobbits

Considering it's the end of the world today, I thought I'd join the fruity ranks of blog-makers everywhere.  Yes, that's YOU, America.

If there's anyone I'm excited to see if the end of the world truly is today, It's Bernie Mac.  The way I see it, Bernie, God and myself will sit in velvet armchairs and smoke cuban cigars and just talk for eternity.  

Anyways, I thought I'd make you all a list of ten things to do today.

1. read the love song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T.S. Eliot if you haven't already.  there isn't another poem I've come across that has made me laugh and cry in equal measure as thoroughly as this one.  and despite the number of times I've read it, it's always fresh for new interpretation.  The more I read it, the more I feel it's mine, made for me.  I'm certain it'll do the same for you.

2. Watch Thor in 3D.  Niels and myself sawr it today, and I got this strange compulsion to start carrying around a hammer everywhere I go.  actually it's not that strange.  THOR!

3. Catch the nearest flight to the British Isles, take a ferry to the Isle of Wight, and find Tennyson Downs, depicted above.  I spent the night up there with some of my pop's students the other year, and I sat on the grass and stared into the sky like a five year old through the night owing to the overabundance of stars.  It's perfectly indescribable unless you've been there yourself. 

4. Go to Japan, find a "dollar store" and check out the merchandise.  They're a barrel of laughs. for example, puppets, like finger puppets, only designed for the male genitalia.  WITH PICTURED DIRECTIONS ON THE BACK.  Just... Japan.

5. Find Bayley Christensen and chat her up.  Ten minutes with her and you won't want to talk to anyone else ever again.  She's a doll in the first degree.

6. Try and fail to beat my high score in Robot Unicorn Attack. 

7. Read The Book Thief.  wonderful book. I'd be reading it right now, but my copy is a soggy swollen mess at the bottom of some trash can in Keswick, due to a faulty zip lock bag and a 14 mile hike through hell itself over Scafell pike in stormy weather.  John, I hope you're happy.  

8. watch the music video for 'Dig, Lazarus, Dig' by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds.  here, let me get that for you.

9. play scrabble with my grandmother.  She's a rapscallion and will stop at nothing to outscore you.

10. stop reading dumb blogs.  It's the end of the world for god's sake!


  1. I think reading this was maybe the only thing I would have needed to do today if the world had in fact ceased to be.

  2. and good taste.
    (to add to my first comment)

  3. What's this?